I don't damn fit in this town. I fucking hate it here, all I want is being free and leaving this bullshit behind me.
Quite nobody ever seemed to understand me, I mean they pretend but they don't.
They just don't notice how mentally fucked up I am, but that's alright I guess, because someday they'll need help and then I'm gonna be the one who don't gives a shit about anyone anymore.
Nobody will ever destroy my plans, I'll leave this place as soon as I can,
I haven't really started living yet, I was just existing for so long, but when my time comes there will be no one to hold me back.
It will still take some time until I can finally break free, but I'm gonna stay strong and stand all the suffer.
It will be worth it.

... And in the end I start to feel like shit once again, you treated me just like some other idiot, it hurts like hell  and you don't even care.
You still complain about your life but never cared that I'm human too and I have feelings.
Go right ahead and laugh at the girl who fell in love too easily.
There were just so many promises you couldn't keep.
I don't know how or why I even fell for you, I guess I did because you made me.
Even if I knew it all along that it was all lies, it was just so easy to believe someone if he tells you exactly what you want to hear.
Once I really thought you cared a bit.
But now I know you never did and you never will.
I'm too fucking naive and you just threw me all away, so go on ignoring me.
But thats okay, I wouldn't choose me either between all these other girls.
I just want you to know that I love you with all my ugly heart.

Have you ever looked in the mirror and couldn't stand who's looking back? 

When I look at myself I only see the chances I've missed, the things I've failed, the persons I've lost, everything I couldn't own, every painful memory.
Finally my surface is cracking. I'm bruised and scarred by all the things I keep inside, they tear me from the inside and only I can see this.
No one understands what it means to be me, how it hurts to take a look at myself, they think it's just so simple.
But it is not, and I guess it will never be.
I'ts not only that I hate the way I look, I hate the way I act, the way I feel, the way I hide so many things.
And what hurts the most is that I've completely lost myself but nobody ever noticed.
They're too fucking busy with beeing ok with their lifes:

But that's ok, I'm gonna survive that somehow,I'm gonna survive every painful feeling.
Just don't dare to call me pretty without knowing who I am. 

No, really, emotions are messi.

There is no need for them, they are just balast,

I guess I'm better off without this human stuff.

 Breathe in the smoke of vengeance
Breathe out new fucking freedom.

                                         so isn't it great to find that you're really worth nothing?

                                                     Don't belive them what they tell you you are..

... And I don't give a fuck about a restart, I don't give a fuck about a damn second chance when someone always left me back down, people never change.

I'm atrociously?
What I did is nothing in compare to what you did to me!
I'm a liar?
Start realising the truth!
I'm hatred?
See who's left when I turn my back on you now!
I'm a fool?
Oh nice to know that I'm the guilty one while you treated me like shit!
I'm untrustworthy?
Go and drown in your lies!
I'm strange?
At least I don't act like someone I will never be!


Start facing the truth, I don't take part in your wicked games anymore, go and cry about it.

getting creative:

I don't smile, because I have no reason to.
Everyone expects me to be fine, the don't even ask if something's wrong, they take it for granted that everythings alright.
No one would accept if I'd say that I'm NOT  fine and NOTHING  is alright and I am tired of pretending it is.
All those society zombies with their fake smiles and their optimism, they make me sick.
It's so hard to notice that nothing is fine at all, but it is even harder trying to act like it is.

Oh, how I love these autumn nights

                                                             

Let me sink, let me drown don't try to pick me up.
Let me jump, let me fall just let me hit de ground.
Don't dare to say you know me, don't dare to say you care.
Just turn around, close your eyes and plug your ears like you always did, it's so simple.
Let me be on my own because that's all I've ever known.

I swear I'll never let you down

I swear I'll always keep you safe

I swear I'll always be around when you need me

I swar you'll always be forgiven long before you offered an excuse,

because that's what I expect a friendship to be.

Be nothing but simply insane.
Take the courage to blame yourself.
Shout out loud everything you're thinking.
Don't be afraid of denial, always remind yourself it's better being conspicuous than being equal.
Just be yourself.
...
But if you can be a fucking badass unicorn then always be a badass unicorn.

People change, but memories stay forever...

My live became so confusing, that I even lost my identity...

I'm a victim of reality, so keep it far away from me.

Let my imagination run wild and free, it's showing me who I could be.

I'm stuck here, evereything's the same,oh my life is such a shame.

All those people are so blind to what happens in my mind.

All those things inside my head making my real life feel dead.

There is no way to love, 

Love is the way. ♥

                                                                      Bored of being bored

                                                                     because beeing bored is

                                                                                  Boring!

You're more important than you think you are.
You need to lose the fear of beeing wrong,
I'ts not who you are that holds you back,
It's who you think you are not.
Don't try to please everyone,
Thats not the way to succes,
It's just the key of failure.

So stay yourself, you're damn wonderful in your own strange way.

It's always the hardest to decide whether to run away from everything or to deal with it and to try harder 

.

You are what you listen to.

I don't really believe in anything, not even in myself.

Dear all of you who've wronged me,
I am, I am, a zombie
Again, again you want me to fall on my head
I am, I am, I am a zombie
How low, how low, how low you will push me
to go, to go, to go before I lie down dead